Teacher: "Can you please tell the class why you're so late?"
Me: Someone told me to go to hell
Me: Couldn't find it at first
Me: But now I'm here

canadianprimeminister:

gps: *says something*
everyone in car: *mocks gps pronunciation*

Parent to child at the library: Shhh...remember what we said about being loud in the library?
Child: We'll wake up the books.
Parent: That's right.

homestuckorbust:

helianthi:

What did the pirate say when he turned 80

Aye matey

GO TO HELL THAT WAS CLEVER

an-abundance-of-silly-siljes:

lesleylloyd:

quiteyours:

it gets me every time

EVERY. TIME

Still my favorite picture on the internet

an-abundance-of-silly-siljes:

lesleylloyd:

quiteyours:

it gets me every time

EVERY. TIME

Still my favorite picture on the internet